The couples were then given some false feedback on their answers: half were told that they experienced the sensory world in the same way as each other, while the other half were informed that they did so differently. The couples were then given the opportunity to chat about some unrelated images, as the researchers observed them, coding their interactions. According to a computational analysis of their speech, they even converged linguistically, using certain words to express precisely the same meanings.
Experts say it's not enough to have common interests with a date or new friend to click — shared reality theory is thought to play a bigger role Credit: Alamy. Rossignac-Milon has also investigated the role that shared reality plays in drawing strangers to each other. She matched pairs of individuals who had not met before and connected them via an online platform.
Those dyads were more likely to say that they clicked with each other — that they had struck up a rapport with the person on the other side of the screen and would be quite happy to meet in real life. They also experienced more certainty in what they thought was going on in the images. So, they felt closer to the other person, and more confident in their own opinions about the world. Many online dating sites are designed around the principle that if you can gather enough data on an individual, you figure out a perfect match.
If a new relationship is an act of mutual creativity, however, the right match may be very hard to predict. If one way we form a social bond is to build a shared reality, then perhaps we can look to create opportunities for conversations about external stimuli. Indeed, we do that already: lists of dating tips often suggest that a first date should include some kind of cultural activity, like a visit to an exhibition. Strolling around a gallery, talking about the art on display, can be a quicker route to rapport than a more direct conversation.
Of course, much of this is hard to do at the moment. D, there certainly is. Chemistry has also been used to describe lust, but for the purpose of this article, chemistry in this context refers to mutual romantic interest and compatibility —two important components of a lasting relationship. Meet the Expert. Kelly Campbell, Ph. D, is a professor of psychology and human development at California State University, San Bernardino.
Campbell's research focuses on couple relationships and friendships. Read on to learn more about the chemistry between people and the six characteristics that may increase that romantic chemistry. Think about how you feel when someone can truly make you laugh. If you and your partner share humor and find one another interesting, you probably have mutual interest. When you are not in the person's presence, you are thinking about and looking forward to seeing them again.
Reciprocal candor refers to when you can just talk to someone so easily about any topic. It means you have easy communication, a sense of trust, and feel understood in the relationship.
Especially looking toward the future of a relationship, this is an incredibly important trait. Personableness refers to a person's demeanor. Chemistry can grow if both people are genuine, down-to-earth, caring, and kind. When it comes to intimacy, it doesn't necessarily refer to physical attraction. Intimacy in romantic chemistry is a blend of reciprocal candor and personableness.
It's an intimate, trusting connection you feel with nobody else. Not to be confused with physical similarity, this trait refers to "matching each other on core attributes, such as values, morals, beliefs, and life goals," explains Campbell. People who are mismatched on values likely won't last long in a relationship together because these attributes are unlikely to change and dictate how people live their lives.
Core values speak to how you want to live your life. Examples of core values include honesty, curiosity, empathy, transparency, and humor. The process of familiarizing yourself with a stimulus can evoke positive feelings. The feelings that familiarity generates transfer themselves onto the stimulus itself. There are, however, some exceptions.
When the initial interactions are negative, repeated exposure is unlikely to make us like someone more. In fact, the opposite is true. The more we are exposed to that person, the less we like them. Social psychologists have a definitive verdict about which one of these two statements is true. We tend attract people who are similar to us. Finding people whose attitudes, values, and traits are similar to our own encourages affection.
In addition, the more similar someone is to you, the more attractive you find them Byrne, There are several reasons that similarity increases the possibility for mutual attraction. One of the reasons is that we assume that people with similar attitudes will see us positively.
Affection has a strong reciprocity effect. As a result, knowing that someone sees us in a positive light encourages us to pay attention to that person. We all know exceptions to the general rule of similarity in attraction. Nevertheless, their components attract each other. Social psychologists give some examples of this. Some people attract others because of the need that they satisfy.
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